Tuesday, December 14, 2010

Reflections

Okay so you remember that blog post I made way back in October about SATs? I didn't, but I just went back and read it and I have to say that I lied. I don't have friends who care about how I feel. Okay that's not completely true either. How about this, I have 1.75 friends who care about how I feel. Why the odd number? I'm not sure if one of them actually does, but they seem to show it. So anyways, onto my so-called friends.

High school changes people in strange ways. Recently, who I thought was one of the people that understood me best, who I would pour out my secrets to, who I though cared, turned into an apathetic homework machine. It's a sad day when you realize that your friends care more about their grades than they do about your feelings. It's a worse day when you realize that one of your closest friends would wave you away because they have an all-important and life-threatening test to study for. Someone who was usually kind and understanding person turned into a cold, sardonic and belittling character.

What am I supposed to do?

Close Every Door

Close every door to me,
Hide all the world from me
Bar all the windows
And shut out the light
Do what you want with me,
Hate me and laugh at me
Darken my daytime
And toture my night
If my life were important I
Would ask will I live or die
But I know the answers lie
Far from this world
Close every door to me,
Keep those I love from me

Just give me a number
Instead of my name
Forget all about me
And let me decay
I do not matter,
I'm only one person
Destroy me completely
Then throw me away
If my life were important I
Would ask will I live or die
But I know the answers lie
Far from this world

Wednesday, December 8, 2010

The Hard Way

Is it me or maybe, when I look around daily
I don’t even know the people I can put my trust in lately
People that I used to hang with now their actin’ to different
I’m still the same person why doesn’t anybody listen
Can somebody please just explain to me
What happened to the way that we always said we’d be
Right now I don't know why I push through the pain that I got through
And I’m losin’ hope